The Cultural Shift
“Each new generation of mothers will need searing honesty from their peers — because we can talk about how hard it is all day long, but until the moment new moms are experiencing it, they’re not really listening.”
If you haven’t read the New York Times opinion piece “Early Motherhood Has Always Been Miserable,” by Jessica Grose, you should!
What I love is how it highlights the cultural shift idealizing motherhood over the past several decades while also normalizing the “maternal ambivalence” that many of us experience (and often feel guilty about).
While browsing social media, we see the images of calm mothers doing it all and doing it well. It makes it difficult to anticipate the other part of motherhood, that which is difficult and puts pressure to effortlessly adapt and change to our evolving identity, children and relationships. Social media, in my opinion, is one of the most impactful shifts in motherhood over the last decade and it effects our well-being, challenging our intuition and confidence in decision-making.
The other challenge is, as Grose notes in her piece, no woman knows until they become a mother. Grose writes, “Each new generation of mothers will need searing honesty from their peers — because we can talk about how hard it is all day long, but until the moment new moms are experiencing it, they’re not really listening.”
So, as you read this, how are you preparing? How are you coping if you’re already there? Is it what you expected?
In retrospect, I moved through the days without intention, without prioritizing what was truly important to me and I wasted time. Time I’ll never get back.
My Passions
In addition to individual and family therapy, my life’s experience has led me down some very distinct paths.
Supporting New Moms
My journey as both a therapist and a mom has led me to develop a deep passion for supporting women during the crucial stages of early motherhood. I’ve seen and lived the challenges that mothers face—juggling expectations, managing family dynamics, and dealing with the day-to-day pressures of parenting.
I know firsthand how overwhelming and unexpected this phase of life can be, which is why I created the Calm Mama Program and the Calm Collective Community—to offer the guidance and support I believe every mother deserves. It’s my goal to help women feel more prepared, supported, and confident in their roles as mothers.
I believe in staying present and intentional, and I strive to help mothers create the balanced family life they envision, free from guilt and societal pressures.
Supporting Families
I’m also passionate about teaching Emotionally Strategic Parenting to help parents foster healthy, adaptive communication with their children. My focus is on facilitating positive interactions, reducing symptoms of depression and anxiety, and building strong, resilient families.
I’m committed to the idea that emotionally healthy individuals and families are the foundation of a strong community.
Working With Children
I realized early on that I really enjoyed working with children. In fact, I was certified as an early childhood teacher as a high school student. Working as a teacher helped me realize the amount of trauma children experience at such a young age, but I was inspired to do more. So I went back to school and got my degree in mental health counseling.
Building Teams
From coaching sports to launching and developing new therapeutic programs and teams in NYC, when I work with people, I am always thinking about working as a team and developing the team around you.
If there’s someone everyone wants to be there for them in life, it’s their mother. We remember everything about our mothers because, in my opinion, they are the most impressionable.
Growing up, my mom had a ditty bag with this flower on it. I remember her as someone who dressed up and wore makeup only on the holidays, and that really was a stretch. But when I found this bag on college break some 20 years ago, I snagged it and put it in my closet.
I recently rediscovered it and have been carrying it with me to work with some extra toiletries. Even though it doesn’t represent her in the traditional way a simple makeup bag might, it reminds me of her. I suppose it represents a lot of what she is not—concerned with what others think. She brings her whole self to the table, as is, and I can’t think of a better model for women today.
I share all of this because our children hold the biggest part of their hearts for us, for mom. How we show up for them, who we are and who we are not is what they remember.
How will your children remember you?
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